First a correction. We listen to not only what you say but how you say it. This gives us more depth into understanding you and your issues. Your word choices and observations tell us a lot about you and the other person as filtered for you.
That being said, I think the main question is: how intimate are you with this person?
One needs to enjoy every day and feel if not loved at least appreciated and honored by the person you are with.
If you do not think he appreciates you or cares that you are there and is not your friend and confidante as well as the fun in your life then you must seriously ask yourself what am I doing here?
Alison and I know that it’s easy to get attached to a partner, and replacing him might not be easy. But realize that being with him blocks you from even having comfort from someone else.
Would you consider leaving to live with a female roommate whose company you enjoy as well as the things you can do socially together? It might be preferable to a male partner who just wants a maid, and someone to share the bills.
We understand that after many years together, it is easy to take someone for granted. However, that doesn’t make it right for either person.
Ask yourself: Do I still enjoy his company and do we do things together which make me happy and which we enjoy? And, do I still love him enough to tolerate his lack of consideration and possibly lack of interest? Then, make a decision.